There seems to be this thematic convergence happening right now…
And, what to do with rejection.
Side note-I’ve done the math (because I’m weird that way) and I have an average of .80 rejections per week this year-which equates to almost one rejection letter a week for 41 weeks. You can’t fault me for trying(and trying, and trying)-that’s for sure. I have always wanted to be considered an expert in something-just never thought it would be in this particular arena but, hey, beggars can’t be choosers right?
So. What does it all mean? Should I tuck tail, hit the road and not look back? This has crossed my mind but no. Does this change how I think about myself? Not really. Does it mean I’m not really an artist? Oh, hells no. Maybe it just means I need to change how I feel about rejection or maybe it means that I need to change my approach. I can’t say I am going to know what any of this means until a loooooong way down the road. With most lessons you don’t realize the true purpose until you are well past the trial itself. I think, for right now, I need to stop over thinking it, embrace it and stop to listen to what this may be saying.
Easy, peasy. Ha.
I can be accused of a lot of things but not thinking enough about something isn’t on of them. I tend to pick and pull at an idea or thought until it is unraveling and tattered and looks as tortured as I feel. Facing a stack of rejections isn’t any different. I want to know why or what and how can I change all the no’s into yeses. It’s not that I want them to like me-I really don’t care-I want them to like what I do-I want my work to be accepted and valued and when it isn’t it bugs me. With the umpteenth rejection rolling in-and my wallet getting model thin-it’s time to start thinking differently.
A few years back my kids gave me a mother’s day gift that rocked my socks. It is a silver bracelet and I have-literally-not taken it off (willingly) since the day that gave it to me.
To be nobody but yourself in a world that’s doing it’s best, night and day, to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting.
e.e. cummings is an all time favorite and the fact that they chose this verse to be engraved on the bracelet, well, I love every sterling inch of it and these words have shored me up more times than I care to admit.
Going forward I am choosing to look at what has been offered to me in all this rejection and do a little re-evaluation of direction and purpose. I will never ‘stop fighting’ but I am never to big to not learn a lesson or two when it is clear I need to do some listening instead of fighting.
It’s not going to be easy-and I don’t think it will be quick either and it will probably be a bit murky. All I know is that I am on this path. Today. And I am ready to do the hard work of figuring this all out.
So, rejection? Yeah, bring it on. I know there are a few more floating out there and I’m ready for ya. Just know they can’t all be no’s-there will be yeses and they will be beautiful….